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How to Avoid Arguments and Get Your Way

  • April 12th, 2010 by Pastor Darryl Curtis   |  2 Comments

A certain woman had a favorite author. The author wrote a new book, and the woman found out that the author was coming to her town to participate in a book signing at the local Walmart. The book signing was from 7 to 10pm. Her husband usually got home from work about 6:30, and her plan was to make dinner, start feeding the kids, a three and one year old, and then leave as soon as he came home. She hoped that if she got to the Walmart at 7pm, she could get out of there and get home in an hour or so.

When her husband came home that evening, he wasn’t too pleased with her plan. “I’ll just be gone for an hour or so”, said the woman. “Just feed the kids and play with them and I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

When the woman reached the Walmart and went inside, she saw that the line for the book signing stretched up the aisle and around the wall of the huge building. Apparently, she wasn’t the only one that liked the writing of the author. She got in line, and began chatting with the women waiting near her.

At about 8:30, she remembered her husband and called him. “Dear”, she said, “the line is still pretty long. I’m not sure when I’ll be home, but I hope it’s pretty soon.”

“Can’t you come home now?”, said her husband. “I would really like you to come home.”

“Well”, said the woman, “I’ve waited an hour and a half, and I would really like to get my book signed.”

“Oh, all right”, grumped her husband, “just get home as quickly as you can.” He hung up.

The woman turned to her neighbor and went back to her conversation as the line crept along. Finally, at 10pm, she reached the front of the line, chatted briefly with the author, had her book signed, and headed for the parking lot to get in her car and go home.

She was pleased at having her book signed, but, as she drove, she began to dread having the fight with her husband that she knew was coming. “I’ve had such a pleasant evening”, she said to herself, “and I don’t want to spoil it by having a fight. But I’m entitled to have an evening out every now and then, and he shouldn’t be mad just because I left him with the kids. They’re his kids too, you know.”

But then she realized that she was preparing for a fight, and she didn’t want to have one. What can I do to avoid a fight? she thought to herself.

It dawned on her. She had a yellow teddy in the closet that she rarely wore, and her husband really liked it.

When she reached the house, the lights were out. She entered quietly and checked on the kids, who were asleep in bed. She snuck into their bedroom. Her husband was sleeping, so she eased into the closet, took off her clothes, put on the yellow teddy, and slipped under the covers. As she snuggled up next to him, he woke up and realized that he had a warm woman on his back. He turned to her, smiled at the yellow teddy, and they enjoyed an intimate evening. And there was no fight.

He was cheerful the next morning when he went to work, and that afternoon, he sent her a text asking her if she had any more books that she wanted to get signed.

Somebody told women that they need to challenge their husbands to get their husbands to respect them, and that the way to get that which they want from their husband is to try to argument him into it. Nothing could be further from the truth. God has given you a way to get your husband to do anything that you want. It’s just not by conversation.

Song of Solomon 7:6-10
6 How fair and how pleasant you are, O love, with your delights!
7 This stature of yours is like a palm tree, And your breasts like its clusters.
8 I said, “I will go up to the palm tree, I will take hold of its branches.” Let now your breasts be like clusters of the vine, The fragrance of your breath like apples,
9 And the roof of your mouth like the best wine. The wine goes down smoothly for my beloved, Moving gently the lips of sleepers.
10 I am my beloved’s, And his desire is toward me.

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2 Responses for "How to Avoid Arguments and Get Your Way"

  1. Pastor Darryl Curtis January 19th, 2011 at 6:28 am

    But think about it for a minute.

    Why do you come to the conclusion that it is “wrong” for a wife to have sex with her husband? Is it that you consider a wife having sex with her husband to be a form of oppression?

    If it is your opinion that wives having sex with their husbands is a form of oppression, then, may I ask, with whom would you prefer that husbands have sex? The lady down the street?

    1Corinthians 7:3-5 tells us:
    3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.
    4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
    5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

    It’s just my opinion, but you may want to rethink your hostility to wives having sex with their husbands…..

  2. Sheila May 10th, 2010 at 12:03 pm

    Wow! I am really disgusted with this article. What about the scripture that states “Love your wife as yourself and be considerate as you live with your wife or consider others better than yourself. This selfish man feels entitled to have an attitude because his wife goes out to have a book signed. Your attitude is to have sex with him to avoid an argument. If I was her I would have simply got in bed and reminded him that this is a partnership. There is no need to argue and there is no need to put on a teddy to have men own up to their family obligations., I would hate to go to your church because it appears to me that you are another example of men who supress the church for their own selfish deisres.

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